Hou Mei

Listening to : Somebody told me - the killers

Commission loh!!!
Block Leave Loh!!!
Genting Loh!!!
Christmas LOH!!!
NEW YEAR COMING LOH!!!!
Yeah, that sums up almost everything.
its been so busy my body clock spoil. Oh well.
HOU MEI!!!!

buddy budyy

Listening to : Insomnia - Criag David

One more week. Just one more week to i throw the cap. I can't wait man.
The week passed by alot faster than the 1st week. Guess cause of the many breaks we had. However, the last week will be the toughest of them all.
morning till afternoon marching and everything. I believe i can do it!
The hightlight was still the 10 x 400. Though we didn't win, we gave it our best in trg and the day itself. In the end, it totally wasn't something about competing but really, its something which i really enjoyed.
It brought back memories and it was simply fun. We all made it a point not to put on any stress but just give it your best and enjoy taking over. Thats what happened. and yup, WOOHOO!!!

Shiming finish her exams

Alvan is back.
Half of everyone else is going to commission...
WOOHOOO!!!
It seems all of the closest around me are back!!
I really wish i just had more time out of camp to simply spend time em!
As for shiming, (i know she will read this), i'm happy her exams are over.
I dunno about the rest but to me, it seems that exams in uni are no joke.
Like your stress level can hit all time high.
To think that A levels was the most hardcore!
Yeah, and Alvan killed a quail and is back and is more man.
Yup, those are my buddies for you.
Even when we're going to commission, i kind of hope not to lose contact with some of the air wing people. I guess for me, the only take away from NS is really the friends. Ok maybe some core values blah blah blah.
But we all know its rather rubbish when you're totally out of it.
Now in the outside world, I do wanna keep in touch with some of the guys. They're really kind of fun.

HOWEVER! Swinging to other extreme. There are people whom i totally DETEST in air wing! Ok, just about a handful but yeah, i really detest them!
I mean, how low an EQ, IQ can they have!?!?
Shall not say much but apparently the sentiments are mutual.
Which i am totally ok with. I really am. However, if u wanna tell the whole world about it, you don't do it on a blog which is really public.
Let me give you an example, if u wanna BITCH about an individual, you don't put your blog address on your msn nick. Its DUMB.
Guess he thought "Oh i didn't give him my blog add, he wouldn't read it!"
Well, it seems that C3 training ain't that useful after all. So much for considerations eh??
Ok enough said, anymore and i'll be reduced to his level. (btw, he probably spent a whole afternoon blogging about how much he hates everyone).

On a lighter note, the long weekend is really enjoyable.
I can't wait for block leave. I'm still really hoping for the trip to come to past!
Time to go out now!! WOOHOO!!!

never noticed

Listening to : About a girl - The Academy is...

its like a few more hours to book in time!
I dunno, its been so long since i felt like i don't wanna book in.
This time i really don't wanna book in.
Its just so so dreadful and all. The fact that i'm going so far away and all.
Saturday book out just spoils everything and stuff.
Either way, i'm going to try to make the most of everything. I say TRY to make the most. So i dunno if i'm really able to effect change at all.
Other than that, i'm hoping that this week will be alot better with shiming ending her exams and all.
All this rubbish for one commissioning parade. I do hope its really worth it.
Well, enough said, time to book in really soon!

3 hell weeks!!

Listening to : Just Stand up

I thought that life in joint term couldn't be THAT difficult. I mean seriously!!!
How hard can 3 weeks of marching be.
Well, the week wasn't just physically tiring but also rather saddening.
The fact that we're SO far from home!! It really sucks!
Though we had 2 nights out!!!
I didn't go out at all. no point at all i guess.
However, the only thing which i thought was really useful was actually running.
Despite the extreme strain on the muscles and yes the rush of blood to the head.
It really feels like school again. HAHA!
Yes it does! I actually love it. Also pushing others to do it also.
It all kinda makes sense. I just hoped we had started a little earlier, it would have had amazing effects. As of now, we still are fighting.
A 10 x 400 race. Ain't easy at all!!!
Well, wish me all the best for the next 2 weeks!!!
Then commission loh!!!
However, after that, what next? I mean, i never really really thought about it.
Part of me honestly wants to be that playful boy. Another ones to be good.
Hmmm, somehow i know i'll drift towards the bad boy then after good boy.
Yup. thats me! WOOHOO!!!

Change the world

Listening to : Heaven - CHC

The past 2 days were really quite mind blowing.
I was excited for Asia conference. However, i never knew that it would be this great. I was really really impressed by all of the moves and words spoken upon us.
For me, i really somehow believe that there is going to be a huge change in the world in the next few months.
When there's economic crisis, this is when the move comes. Lives change.
Theres really nothing much i can say. I don't want to lose the touch.
Admist all the busy schedules lined up. I won't want to be left hanging.

Young once only

Listening to : Summer hair forever young - The Acedemy is

My leg, is dying...
Literally. There're cuts and blisters and everything everywhere.
All cause of the boots and everything. Cause mine is so new, it is SO hard.
Thus it keeps cutting into my legs!! I so want to change the boots to an older pair! Well, for now its all suck thumb.
All the pain for the next 3 weeks and then we are FREE!! Commissioning is really just around the corner. Oh man!
SAFTI also feels really freaky compared to AFS.
Honestly, AFS was like the best it could ever get. Close to no regimentation.
Safti on the other hand. I'm waiting to die. Die a slow and painful death!

Just a little more

Listening to : The Saddest Song - The Ataris

Its been close to a year since i've first heard this song. Yup.
I guess it has stuck with me throughout cause it really does remind me alot of school and studing and basically enjoying life.
Maybe wondering why life ain't great now, cause of Army.
However, i'm really at the tail end of everything. In a few hours, i'm going to be given my brevet and my sword. That to me is quite big stuff man.
In 3 weeks i'll be commissioning. I know i say this all the time but....
It really is THIS close.
Its been such a long long painful wait.
As for now, gotta catch up with most of the juniors whom i haven't spoke to for a while. Yup. they're all great people. Yes they are. HAHA!

The world in your hands

Listening to : CCC

So it seems tha this whole week was more eventful than i thought it would be.
Meeting up with juniors feels great. Maybe it makes me feel like I'm young in school days again. Or maybe cause i really love hanging out with them.
A few friends to me are really important. The whole bunch of them are to me.
So thank god for them and hope they all do well for their exams and all.

However, the most impactful thing would really be the coming Asia Conference.
I'm really sad i can't go for alot of them.
However, i really can't wait to go for those that I can.
This will really change the entire Asia and most importantly the lives of my family. When the miracle occurs, when it actually happens for ging ging, the family will come to believe, then the entire household will be saved.
The entire household of the Choong. I really want that to come to past.
Little can describe how much I want to attend this.
To really impact the culture and be a person of good ethics based on my Faith.

The recent Hitler trial actually raised up many questions which were not answered. Or rather, too grey to be answered.
One of them was the seperation of Morals and leadership.
Also, can morals really be clearly defined?
It isn't as simple as how I put it " Would you kill your grandparents if ordered".
Though its a really good point, and i'm honestly shocked how I managed to say it out. However, it really is too general a statement.
However, to me personally, what determines moral or not, it isn't simply about whether its right or wrong. However, whether something God would call me to do.
I gotta admit, as flakey as it sounds. It really is true.
It doesn't cross my mind often but when really button press i gotta do something i dun wanna do. I'm really going to fall back to that.
Now this Asia conference will help to determine all this.
How we live our lives out for the good of the people and God.
It'll be a time when i think i'll be refreshed. Yes it is. and i believe so.

Make me laugh

Listening to : Hate that I Love you so - Rihanna

So it seems that it is indeed our last week in air force school.
Its been rather eventful actually. hmmm.
Ok maybe not, rather UNeventful. Cause of the CAF interaction and all.
So its alot alot of work.
However, it was interesting when he brought up 2 points of the whole dialogue.

When he said that the culture in Singapore and USA is really different.
If nobody calls you shit-hot in the US, means you're really Dog-shit.
However, If nobody calls you Dog-shit in Singapore, means you're really Shit-hot.
Well, If you get the entire statement, i really find it very very true.
Why are we living in such a sad sad culture.
Where the whole country revolves around punishment, scolding and mere fear.
Not to say it ain't good, don't get me wrong. Its brought us this far and its awesome. However, it really is demoralising for one to constantly be scolded.
If thats what it takes to be the best, i rather not.

Another point he raised was that, in the military or any real organisation,
Your closest person really is your buddy.
When button press, it really is the person beside you you're going to protect.
Also, Don't bother counting loose change and have simple little issues come between each other.
When it really all boils down, will you let the person beside you die cause he didn't pay you 50 cents? Its sad.
SO yes, friendships are important, that I know now.

Therefore!!!!! I have decided to really take all the time i have to give back.
To try to help others where i see possible. To really spend time with those I love.
Ultimately, its really each other we've got when the economy does fail.
Its them i'm protecting everytime I land an aircraft on that runway.

Also, the trial on Hitler went on reasonably well.
Though i lost, yes i know its embarassing. I think I proved the point.
I dunno, but i enjoyed it. I didn't like preparing but i liked just shooting someone down with words sometimes.
However, there were certain things which i said out and i really meant.
Things such as morality and leadership. They can't really be seperated can they?
Oh yes, lastly, i got Cert of Merit, don't ask me how cause i have NO IDEA!!
but either way....
PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!!

good bad and simply indulge

Listening to : Angel - Natasha Bedingfield

So maybe the whole system ain't that bad after all.
Yes i'm out of camp. AGAIN! This was rather unexpected. I mean, i thought yesterday was all i got. However, i'm surprised yet again.
So what did i just do? Relive the harsh times of JC days.
HAHA! Yes i did, i went to run. And its pouring like never before.
So yes, i was able to maintain. I'm surprised.
However, i'm one tired idiot now. Maybe i'll fall sick. Hmmm.
Should i fall sick? Ok, i make it sound like its my choice.
Anyway, its kinda sad, alvan is leaving for brunei. Hope he'll do alright over there. Also, We're leaving air force school really soon.
Just when i found out how to go home. (BTW, i took a bus)
Those wo know me well will pat me in the back and say good job.
HAHA! Can't wait for this weekend. I'm exhausted as hell. However, i just look forward to leaning my head on Shiming. AWWW.

viva

Listening to : Coldplay

I am a coldplay fan. Yes i am. First it was yellow. then fix you. now viva la vida.
It isn't normal for me to be stuck on a song for so long.
Normally its just like 2 to 3 weeks before i get over it.
However, every every EVERY coldplay song, i'll take it for 3 months minimum.
For one, between muse and coldplay. Its coldplay man.
This is random i know. But i spent like an hour plus watching coldplay performances online. So yes i am a fanatic.
Who goes up there and sings a song in such perfect form.
Who swings a bright ball when its reaching the climax and EVERYONE goes mad. I really think they are really great performers.
Next time they come, i'm going to their concert. For SURE!
I know many people will follow me for such a concert.
it isn't simply emo, its awesome.
I mean, who sings "when you try your best and don't succeed" in such awesome tune. Oh gosh. OK! Enough rattling on Coldplay

So its not the integrated term. I'm supposed to be in soon.
So its rather sian. However, its all coming to an end.
It really is, I'm both excited and scared for it.
I know we'll suffer big time in joint term. But who cares. I'm up for it.
Camp life is getting by alright.
All that i want to do now, is to really get my gold bar.
AHHH!!! Coldplay craze. Indulge me in this one post.

gets better

Listening to : Dark Blue - Jacks Mannequin

I do wonder at times. how good can this get?
Life now is too good to be true. Last week was honestly great and I loved it.
Now this week is feeling BETTER! Haha! Yesterday stay out and today off at 2??
This feels like the life. Honestly. However, i'm afriad of joint term.
Yes its the time when i will DIE. Badly. VERY BADLY!
Other than that, I think i'll be quite satisfied with where i am now.
Also, there has been hints i'm going to PLAB. WOOOO!!!!
OH OH OH YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!
I have always told everyone, i can endure ANYTHING you throw at me.
I JUST WANNA GO HOME AT THE END OF THE DAY!
So for PLAB, thats the case!
So i'm honestly looking forward to commissioning.
However, in two weeks....
" We come from OCS, we are the very best, living with dignity and pride..."
I hope i survive. haha! Loving it every one bit!

colour

Listening to : With or without you - U2

Well, due to the many comments about well, the colour of the text, i've decided to change it.
Well, its the start of arise and build. I'm at home, resting up and recovering from flu.
However, couldn't really help but to go down to the morning prayer meeting.
Wow, i was blown away by it, i really think that if i were to go everyday, i'll be so much happier.
Too bad i'm in NS and all. Oh well, next time i hope they start this again.
Today was rather UNEVVENTFUL. However, i'm quite happy leading a rather simple life kinda thing. I dunno why myself.
Like with just shiming studying at my house and me watching vcds and sleeping. I guess with shiming watching me blog, its funny.
SO YES! I will stop now. BACK TO CAMP TOMORROW!!!
Joint term in 3 weeks. WOOOO!!

Hair~~~~

Listening to : Summer hair forever young - The Academy is...

Well, the possible thought of responsibility on me again seems strange.
I dunno. I guess its been THAT long since i've been engaged in anything REAL.
Before, i took things rather lightly.
I guess its the army. Now that i'm a 'trained controller'
The thought of being put in position of a 'leader' is kinda scary.
Not that I doubt myself but its really alot of responsibility.
If u crash a plane, its your fault. So if someone leaves, its your fault. If something goes wrong in hall, its your fault.
I never thought of it this way before i left. Maybe thats why i was THAT carefree
Now its a totally different ball game. If i'm ever going to do this properly,
I think i'll do it REALLY well. No mess ups and no accepting what i cannot do.
I think its just that i don't want them to end up wrong.
Sometimes i also wonder why so much responsibility is placed on me, i mean, i know i've messed up more than enough times.
Its quite nice to know that someone still thinks u still got it in you.

Anyway, its time for me to sleep. I'm so so tired.
i think its cause of the flu. Gonna see a doc tomorrow for 3 sickness.
sounds bad eh. Yes it is. Oh god i wanna die, theres still hitlers idiotic case.
Why can't he just die!!!!
Wait he already did. A sad one too...

Stay out

Listening to : I believe in a thing called love - The Darkness

If you thought that possibly, just possibly, you'll get bored of staying out. Like don't need to stay in camp overnight. THINK TWICE!
This whole week i only stayed in for one night. Honestly, this week is the BEST week of my whole NS life. It really is. It really just refreshed everything.
I was able to stay out everyday, so everynight was really full of something.
Tuesday met up with sean and mark for prata. But was stay in camp.
Then Wednesday had EOC dinner and stay out, so went to play a little bit after dinner. Heh, was really a hell of a time.
Then thursday night went to meet sm and cause stay out, went to timbre with Mark and GOODFELLAS were playing! Awesome!
Though i think i'm really running low on fuel in terms of sleeping. I've never had so much fun in quite a long time. Then today was the halloween party.
WOW! I'm blown away by it. If this could happen everyweek, i'll sign on.

Anyway, some sad news, VAMSEE IS GONE! He's our indian transfer student for our aerodrome course. Honestly, i never really got to know him till the end.
He was a really genuine and nice man. I'm so honoured to have met him.
He said something towards the end of the dinner which really really touched my heart. he said that " I think its an art for you Singaporeans but You all were able to make me forget my home". I was honestly touched by that.
Wasn't expecting that at all. However, i'm sure we may not miss him now, but soon we will. We taught him so much i think he's one of us now.
Not only that, the officers on course are gone. They're like one of the best people around. They made the whole Aerodrome course bearable. They made the whole NS idea fun with so many activities.
They're really nice people and i will do all i can never to lose contact.

Other than that, time for me to sleep.
Tired, going to RS tomorrow i think. HAHA!

SAI KANG!

Listening to : Other side of the world - KT Tunstall

So begins the life of a slack officer.
or rather, glimpses of it! Now that the course is over, life is good.
Seriously, nights out every night and doing almost nothing in camo everyday.
What more can you ask, seriously.
Well. I'm honestly not complaining. I'm quite enjoying it. Though there's always SAI KANG TO DO! Which is a total waste of time.
Some things are worth doing, others are a mere waste of time.
Good example would be things like Vamsee's farewell would be great.
However, doing research on Hitler isn't the most fun thing to do.
I would rather just kick back and relax and sail my way through the next 3 weeks. I am just waiting for posting! COME ON PLAB!
However, one good thing that came out of researching Hitler is that he's really an evil man. I mean, i know how evil can evil get. However, he's for real.
Which is honestly rather disturbing. How can someone so warped exist!?

Besides the point, Halloween is coming. I honestly don't make much of it.
However, this year theres a party! My Cell group is organising some big thing.
So everyone is gonna dress up and all. It sounds good eh.
It'll be fun, any takers? WOOO!
Also, if u haven't watched tropic thunder. Please watch it.
Hmmm, many MANY people have said i'm rather shallow for saying its nice.
WHO CARES! I think its a great movie, its really a great laugh! haha.
Anyway, time for EOC dinner! Time to emcee!

Ties

Listening to : Worthy - CCC

Today was a rather interesting day.
Woke up really really early to meet mark for breakfast.
I'm amazed we were both able to wake up this early actually. Yeah, so ate macs.
However, the interesting things was at night.
We had a meeting with the cousins, well, a rather well planned one.
Cause one of them is getting married, so yeah, one outing before the day itself.
This is what was sent in the mail.
***Special note to Wayne and Lionel - you guys better come fellowship ... more and more of your cousins are being harvested. Lionel, bring your gf if she's free.
I was rather shocked by it. So in the end, we went. How not to after we PANG so often and when its explicitly said to everyone.
In the end, i really had quite alot of fun with them.
Its really rare that i talk to my cousins, the ties are actually forming.
I guess its cause of them coming to church and all. In fact one of them told me, I never had a proper conversation with you before.
Yes, thats how distant i am from them. However, now its really different.
I'm happy when i'm with them, before it was very tensioned.
Now we talk about church and it just flows easily.
Also, its nice to know that your family has got ur backing at some times.
I'm understanding the importance of family ties now.
I'm a really blessed boy. Yes i am, other than the occassional troubles i have.
I'm really blessed to have great people around me. Cause even when times start to suck, i know i'll be able to pull thru with my family and friends help. Yup. :)

Threshold

Listening to : Break Me Down - CCC

I see the world in a rather different way now.
I guess circumstances really influence the way we look at things.
For me, i've just completed my last ever assessment for Aerodrome training.
SO basically, i can control. the sermon on how our words affect our lives was so good.
I remember speaking out on the tower, "I AM AN ATC CONTROLLER".
I felt really confident for some reason. In fact, they commented, my speech was the most confident of all and i enjoyed controlling.
Yeah, I'm really thankful for being able to make it out of the course.
I really thank god for that. It has really been hell hell crazy.
Like really insane tough, enduring real personal attacks and ALOT of rubbish.
I have to admit, there were times i really didn't believe in myself.
Like how shiming says it, I've changed my perspective of many things.
I used to be complaining all the time. But somehow, when i tried to start enjoying it and when i started to think positive it all kinda worked out.
I just wonder how it'll be when I COMMISSION!!! WOOO!!
now i'm researching on Hitler for some CAF interaction, good stuff.
I'm actually learning alot from it. Yeah I am. Surprised I actually am bothered about something related to NS eh.
Think the whole Aerodrome course made me think and move beyond my comfort zone. I pushed the threshold for taking stress for sure.
To talk and hear and look at the same time really stretches you. A new depth of focus and concentration is reached. I hope this benefits me in future.
So yes, ushering seems alot easier, multi-tasking is a piece of cake and study stresses can be overcome!

On another note, I remember in A levels, how stressed I was.
However, EVERYONE around me is like really dying in terms of stress.
Yes they are, I dunno why myself. Some people whom i thought could cope with such stress just couldn't. They're really affected by it.
I said how thresholds can be pushed. And yes, you push it by pushing yourself.
However, there is a limit to how much u can push it. Just like running, theres a fine line to pushing to go faster and well dying.
I admit it takes alot of conditioning, i'm happy i went thorugh A levels cause if i didn't, i think i would have died in Aerodrome training and well wouldn't have succeeded.
Guess for alot of them now, they ain't enjoying what they're doing.
I guess how i did well in A's was cause of my class.
I have toreally thank them. I clearly remember how we would just have fun studying.
Studying is never fun, don't get me wrong. But its how you study.
Every 5 min, there'll be a good refreshing joke. So after every math qn, something just refreshes you. Thats why i never really was affected by the stress.
The company of shiming and alvan in macs also made it real fun.
The occasional night supper with mark spiced things up.
I really am thankful for those times, thats why my A level period wasn't the toughest but maybe one of the best. Yup.
So those mugging really hard for A's or any exam, DON'T GIVE UP!
Don't be so stress, remember they're people arnd you and remember to like what you're doing!

Step up

Listening to : Miss Independent - Neyo

The only thing running through my whole mind for the whole week is honestly the LAST WEEK of training.
Its been SUCH a long time, its finally here. this week determines whether i make it or break it.
I know i can. Actually I've really been quite impacted by sermon yesterday.
No wonder it was a triple pack.
The whole idea of speaking it out and confessing it again and again.
I know i can control. I know i can deconflict two aircrafts coming in for landing.
I know I can do well for my assessment. I know, can and WILL COMMISSION!
I believe so and I guess God will make a way when there really is no way!
Its been a long time but i stayed home to nua today. Not really nua but to 'study' with shiming.
Actually, i've really come to treasure all my friends. My class is really the best you could ask for.
I don't care if they're too clingy or anything. but i honestly wouldn't give them up for any other uni friends.
Now we're all in army, its quite a strange feeling I guess.
On another note. Tropic thunder was by far one of the funniest movies i've ever watched. Like really, if you're a guy, GO WATCH IT!!!

More time required

Listening to : Sunday Morning - Maroon 5

Yes, it is sunday morning! And sadly, the rain ain't falling.
Well, i'm actually quite happy i took leave on friday.
Yes i am. Well, cause of the various things we did.
I think this sudden break was actually a good opportunity to catch up with some ppl.
Also, good time for me to spend it with my dearest.
Friday I crashed NUS. Haha, it was like a familiar feeling.
Cause if you read the posts like two or three years ago, i would be saying abt the same thing.
How i crashed NUS. This time for my gf.
Actually, I tried to study in the library which i thought was ok.
Until I went to lecture. OH GOD! I never knew it could be this boring. ANYWAY!
In the end, the whole day was quite fun.
Cause managed to meet kian fat for lunch. Well, no amelia but guess its ok.
Thereafter we went to eat manhattans fsh mkt. Honestly, it rocks.
Maybe, just maybe it owns fish and co. I dunno, but! I would choose ambience over taste.
Then met the feline at timbre.
MAYBE its just me but i've become a relatively big fan of timbre.
Drinks are ex, but food and music is awesome.
I love it man.
Also, been so long since 4 of us went out.
Then saturday was spent mostly with the guys.
Yeah, a fulfilling week for me actually. Sadly, 2moro is book in early week.
I dunno why myself. I think its dumb.
Anyway, i'm still looking forward to the end.
Its really in sight, just 1 1/2 weeks to go.
The past 7 months was challenging, but i think when i comission, tears may really flow.
So emo right? Anyway. gtg sleep.

2 and running

Listening to : Starlight - Muse

This does bring back memories.
Yes it does, yesterday, me and sm just celebrated our 2 year anni.
Honestly, i think i surprised her quite well, never have i done such wide scale planning before.
However, i'm just happy we both enjoyed ourselves.
Time does fly, its been a good 2 years. It really has.
In fact. I'm really happy we've been together for so long.
I guess its just us but we're a little different.
Normallys its the longer you're together the less sticky you get.
However, the longer we get, the more sticky we get. I dunno why.
I know alot of ppl are annoyed cause of that. WOOOO!

Anyway, today I specially took leave for this, so i'm gonna head to NUS to study today.
EXAM on MONDAY! Fail then OOC.
So ya, this period is really high tension for everyone i guess.
Its even graduation day for the J2s.
I guess i'm overaged for this but i'm rather sticky to the trackers.
three weeks to their exam and three weeks to my end of course.
SO FAST!! Its like 8-9 more weeks to the gold bar.
My NS time is flying by. Honestly, now that i look back.
Things aren't as bad now, think this is cause of some ppl in the course.
Some great ppl, some really REALLY strange.
Ok ok, gonna head to NUS now. YAY

future awaits

Listening to : What Sarah Said : Death Cab For Cutie

Ever wonder what you'll REALLY do in the future?
I mean, like what we'll be...
Some of us will be doctors, pilots, teachers, engineers, businessman.
I'm confused and at the same time worried for it.
I'm now 19 years old, i don't really know what i wanna do.
I honestly blame it on the A levels.
Daniel stayed over at my house yesterday.
What a nostalgic thing to do eh. 19 year old army men sleeping in the same room.
As corny as it sounds, i think its alright.
We were talking about how we're all getting old. Like really OLD.
Maybe its time to stop it. Can u imagine your dad inviting a friend to sleepover...
Ya, same concept. Thats why, I don't really wanna grow up.
Thats besides the point, we were talking about how life will be when we're in uni, when we're working.
It'll be good and bad that we all won't be as tight anymore.
Of course, we talked about the future.
I was SUPPOSED to be the teacher I always wanted to be. Or rather was called to be.
To teach the young kids of our generation, impact life kinda thing.
Pursue the real passion of physics and teaching and sports.
being a teacher and a coach for track or basketball at the same time.
Guess that won't REALLY materialize.
The whole world except the few who really know me tell me,
Take LAW, BIZZ, MEDICINE! Go OVERSEAS to study at oxford!
Impact the MARKETPLACE by being really successfull!
I know all of that is good. I do know. But that isn't what i wanna do.
Until daniel said something quite simple but quite true.
Just keep doing what you're doing, God will speak to you soon.
Yup, just keep doing what i'm doing, to the best I can.
Heh, even though its controlling, I am trying my best. Or rather I will.
On a side note, I WILL be a teacher at least once in my life.
FYI, the current dream is to go out to work first, go get rich by helping a large engineering / Manufacturing Company by managing some big project like the next flyer. Then go hopefully find some real clean energy and make ironman with it. Lastly, when i'm really rich enough, build a school in cooperation with CHC.
Ain't that a dream....

Iron man

listening to : Hotel California - Eagles

A few weeks ago was actually the Beijing olympics.
Then I saw what i considered the near perfection of human speed.
Yup, so that was the SUPERMAN of speed.
However, today, on tv I saw amazing speed. Not only that, the sound of it was really screeching.
However, Unlike many others, including my father, I actually like that sound.
I dunno why myself but its really a sound of speed to me.
The past 3 days was something like an IRONMAN of speed.
F1 FTW.

On a seperate note, Things area getting along just fine.
I've never been happier in such a long time.
Yes i am. I dunno why myself. Gues of the initiated change and this weekend.
The fact that it is NOW and like EVERYTHING is pointing to that.
Yes I think it'll be right NOW.

It was also the 1st time shiming drove me in her dads car.
Honestly, I love to be driven around. Thus it was a real treat to be driven around by my girl.
Yes there were others around and we did get lost THREE times.
However, I think it was a great experience for me.
Going around the whole singapore from the zoo to cathay to serangoon.
Things were great. Heh, I realise we don't exactly need to be ALONE all the time.
Things have changed i guess.

What now?

Listening to : So What -Pink

Yesterday was quite a moment to remember.
For me at least. We had the 1st edge meeting.
Yes, it was awesome. I haven't said that in a long time.
But yes, it was awesome, but the best would be the question.
What about now?
The past was great! Like really really awesome fun.
But what about now?
It just got me thinking a little.
I wanna live for the moment. Live for the present and future.
Not for the past. I'm gonna make most of it all.
Thats why everything seems to have changed a little.
Like,i realised. WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING!
Other than that, I'm quite happy still.
Meeting up with the class was rather chill. Fun.
I'm gonna try to meet them like once a week?
Haha, guess its not just me who is thinkin the sam thing about social circles.
They're great ppl.
For me, I guess i haven't really realised it till now. But my cg is awesome.
Yeah, i dunno, they're fun ppl, they're encouraging.
Thats why i wanna stay with them. Yes i do.

Running to win

Listening to : Crushcrushcrush - Paramore

Its been quite a weekend. I have to admit, it has been quite eventful.
Both fun and at the same time really tiring.
I guess the highlight everytime i'm out is really to unwind and have fun.
I always hate the feeling of booking in and also to just await scoldings.
Well, for now, I'm quite determined to do my best to get things right.
Heh. Honestly, I'm quite burnt out.
9 more painful weeks. AHHH!
At least it is now single digit.
I can do it!!!!

Surprise Surprise

Listening to : The Kill - 30 Seconds to Mars

I Honestly think the reason why i'm home is quite stupid.
Yes i do.
'Nights out to go get your berms!'
Wow! I didn't know it could be this good.
WELL! The good thing about this is that i can GO HOME!
Yes i can.
I do have to admit. God is Good.
When time is taken away, it gets replaced.
This just happens all the time.
As for now, i'm just gonna chill.
Now it really feels like school, i'm gonna be out 2moro in less than 24 hours.
And tomorrow, its HELLO AMAZING RACE!!!!
Wooo!!! I'm gonna sit Hydros car. How nice is that eh....

Little but much

Listening to : Big girls don't cry (remix) - fergie

So its wednesday again! Good day.
Or rather, its relatively ok. Other than the fact that i'm literally getting screwwed for my controlling. Everything else seems rather ok.
Honestly, camp didn't seem too bleak till recently when i started screwing up.
Anyway, I met up with who else but shiming today.
Well, we haven't been spending much time together. We really havent!
But i'm happy. I dunno why, guess its reached a point where seeing just makes it all worth while.
Where little is acutally much.
Maybe its the perception i have nowadays.
Well, as for change. I think i'm going along just fine.
The book "running to win", is really really good. For me at least. It gives me inspiration and it kinda puts things in real perspective for me.
I'm going to try hard to keep this change going.
I'll be out on FRIDAY!
No more running wild for me man. I'm gonna be clean and good from now on!

Refresher course!

Listening to : Breakeven - The script

I guess this weekend has been quite eventful.
Self-realisation sets in. Well, i honestly felt quite bad for many things.
However, i guess today really ended it quite well.
I met up with the trackers and all.
I dunno why, everytime i meet them i feel very at ease and i never fail to enjoy myself.
Same for my class also. I just let go and let loose.
Of course its the same for shiming.
Well, I guess the happiest part of my life is on the track.
Thats why i treasure them so much and I guess I feel good cause theres always a sense of purpose with them around.
Now i'm ready for change. I really really am.
I know it'll be tough. It will be. But i know i can do so.

gd bad

Listening to : Simple, Starving to be safe - Saphne loves derby

Damn sian.
I had a good dream turned bad.
I dreamt I could book in monday morning.
I woke up and realised. DAMN!
Argh. The day ain't starting too well!

Victorious

Listening to : Yesterday - Leona Lewis

Well, I guess its time for us to actually evaluate how has the year been going.
In the more mental/spiritual/emotional side rather than physical side
I guess segmenting it into quarter sections won't be the best idea.
So lets do it by stages.
BMT was good i guess, I was quite Positive most of the time. Despite the initial culture shock for me into ns, it was an ok transition. I clung on to Shiming for most of my support. Not only that but also to God. however, i didn't really bother to meet many friends too often. I dunno why too.

Next was HELLO OCS. Now this was REALLY hell. Like i've never experienced such tough training in a LONG time. Like it really Pushed my mental and physical limits. However, at this point, i was the MOST optimistic and strongest. I duno why too. My girlfriend was there to always support me too.

Thereafter was AIR WING! It was actually a good time for me. Like up till now. Its AFST FTW! I really enjoyed my time there. I had the best buddy there as well. It was also when i started to make time for my outside friends and shiming was really great too! Heh, not only that, I was serving in usher and also quite happy about life on a whole!

Then there was a DIP when i entered the C3. Honestly, life was less demanding like it wasn't so taxing on you physically but it really pushed me. Like this was the part of my life when i was really the lowest. I somehow just lost all the positive attitude i had and also felt quite a drop in my spiritual life. Heh, I honestly felt quite lost. Not only that, there was pressure from the leaders, instructors, friends. I was up to my neck! Shiming was there all the time, thank god for that. Even that, there were times when i felt i wasn't the nicest boyfriend. Also, i think i tried too hard to accomodate ALL my friends, guess I should've done things in a more relaxed way.

For now, some things are still persisting, some things are getting better. However, it really is a disappointment for me. oh man. Like i remember how it was in school previously! I was on top of the day, i always ended the day victorious and started it with an attitude to conquer! However, Now its like I'm trying to survive. Notice the change in use of words. I'm barely excelling in anything i do now. I'm not the 'conqueror' I once was. Thus the name of this blog. I hope i've found the root of the problem. I think i did today in service. I know i'm supposed to wake up feeling good and end it feeling i've been voctorious! Thats how it was all the time! I was on top of every situation! I want it to be that way again.

This post seems quite emo? Yeah, guess it does. Its not the NORMAL lionel post eh. Anyway! Life goes on! Happy to see all the trackers! :)

Hyped up

Listening to : Impossible - Bayje

It's been a while since i've actually started a week on a high note.
Well, that was the case for this week. I dunno why myself.
I think it was simply due to the face that i STAYED at home on sunday night.
Which really helped alot. I dunno why but guess there's some psychological thing.
But i'm glad this week, and its wednesday already! Quite fast to me honestly, ignoring the fact that i gotta do my exercise tomorrow

Met up with Sijia just now. Well, there's been some issues/complications between us before.
But i gotta admit, if there's one friend i'm really thankful for its gotta be her.
Yup, she's been there very often and i guess its been the same likewise.
In fact, she's my longest running best friend. Haha! All my other friends simply fade out of contact. Somehow, i dunno why but she just sticks around.
Guess she was there to pull me back when everyone practically gave up hope.
Yup, can remember how she'll keep calling and calling and how i'll NEVER pick up her calls, intentionally or unintentionally simply to avoid contact.
But i guess it was this persistence that moved me a little to come back.
Other than that, she's really a great buddy whom i'll want to have all the way.

ALSO! On the bright side, NG SHIMING PASSED HER DRIVING!
So happy for her! I remember how she'll whine to me about how annoying her instructor will be.
How tough it will be to drive and complicated things will be and how tough it'll be to juggle both SOT, uni and driving.
At least its all over and she's FREE!!!
Now i can be driven around, ewith my girl right beside me. :)
Can't wait, next problem. Where to get a car. Hmmmm.......
Well, till then! Its the normal transport of CAB!
Sadly so, well, alot of things to think about now. Money, Time, Future.
Now that there's SOME time to breathe, its time to settle all of them out.
Oh and funny thing is, when my girlfriend JUST ended, I JUST started.
Basic Theory on Friday. wow

Sickly

Listening to : How i could just kill a man - charlotte sometimes

I guess i'm really not watching myself.
I'm like coughing like an idiot now. The last time i coughed so much was my auzzie trip.
I was like a sick dog. Dragging myself in and out of bed.
My nose bled like once a day.
I'm quite happy i'm not in such a state yet though.
But the flu and cough is really making my stay awake and is really annoying.
the cough medicine makes u drowsy so u sleep.
I had the best sleep on Friday night after the medicine.
Well, the bad thing was that it was TOO STRONG! I woke up half dizzy and high.
For real, it made me higher than any alcohol i've ever taken.
It took me till like after lunch to wear it off.
I'm never taking that again. I can imagine myself controlling when i'm high.
Aircrafts will crash everywhere.
Well, good thing about all of this is that i get to go in 2moro morning instead of tonight.
However, the bad thing would definitely be that i gotta wake up same time and all still.
To me, the comfy bed makes all the difference. yes it does!
Gonna sleep real early to wear the 'high' off.
This week was super emo....
EMO to the max man. well i hope next weekend would be better!

soundtrack

Listening to : Thunder - Boys Like Girls

Confinement is finally over!
The pain of it was alot less excruciating than what i thought it would be.
Like the 9 hours passed by quite fast and it appeared as if time flew by.
Though the officers on course would be a little more uptight on certain things.
But apparently they couldn't be bothered about us chilling and resting.
Actually its 3 plus in the morning and i'm really wondering why i'm not sleeping my ass off.
Other than that, tomorrow will be spending my day with shiming.
Speaking of which, i've been listening to music alot.
To me, every season and every occasion has a new theme song or rather a soundtrack.
Haha, I remember when it was in the A level period, 'won't go home without you' was in.
During the BMT it was 'pictures of you' which got the mood in for me.
During the prom time it was 'Saddest song'. For now, it's 'thunder'.
The songs may not ENTIRELY match the situation but it really makes me remember the days and times spent in that situation. Like how sad i'll be in tekong, how tough it was in A levels.
As for my girlfriend. There're too many songs to name.
Actually most songs all relate to her. Haha! Guess its just me but yeah.
I remember her most of the time in camp....
Sorry for those buddies of mine but i think of her like 80% of the time!
Anyway, enough of that. time to SLEEP!

Sweet escape

Listening to : The man who can't be moved - The Script

Its been an interesting week, but an agonizing weekend.
Why?
Cause of confinement, I mean, i ain't THAT sore about it but...
Its just you know. As annoying as it can be.
Got quite alot to talk about this time. Yes i do.
To me, the biggest thing would definitely be wednesday.
My parents wedding anniversary.

To me, Such events should be celebrated internally.
Ie. Within the couple.
However, i guess they think otherwise.
So my dad being the non-romantic guy.
Indeed surprised us all.
"We are throwing a surpirse for your mummy at the best steakhouse in town, do dress appropriately and don't tell her."
Yup, that was what my dad said, I was honestly really really shocked. To hear those words emerge from his mouth was like vegetables to me. And I don't eat vegetables...
So yeah, we indeed went to the best steakhouse in town.
I mean the BEST like MORTONS. I thought it'll be costly. But not THAT costly.
Well, cut long story short. I'm honestly quite happy to see them both this way. It didn't turn out exactly like how it should be, but my mum was really surprised nonethless.
In the end, seeing them hug at such an old age kinda gets both goosebumps on my hands and also a warmth in my heart.
I mean, how cool would it be if we get married in future and remain so loving?

Guess in Singapore we ain't the best loving creatures around.
Dad works, Mum 90% of the time works, kid is left to the maid/childcare.
So yeah, thats the rough idea of the family structure.
At least that is the idea for me. I didn't bother looking into wikipedia to find the stats but i'm guessing those are the structures of most families in Singapore.
ALSO! It's common to say "don't eat where you shit". Ie. Don't get your partner where you work. Therefore! The couple wouldn't be in such close contact anymore.
Looking at me and shiming, i guess we're an anomaly but we really can't stop meeting each other. I know i'm what 9 months into NS but i still literally DEMAND to see her every weekend.
I guess and I hope that is the same way for her. Or at least thats what she says. So i believe her.
We're NOT in the same organisation as we were in JC, so I guess it really does take effort.
So this is to all married/going to get married/planning marriage/wannabes.
Its all about keeping the LOVE!

Ok, you have got to be thinking, Lionel is partially gay.
NO I'M NOT! I just thought i should talk about this after my parents anniversary.
I salute my Dad for such an act.
Well, enough mushy stuff. Time to sleep. Sian.

last minute

Listening to : Shadow of the day

This is really the last 5 minutes.
I seriously hate this time.
I will always blog once then 1st thing i'm out and once again right b4 i go in.
The attitude swing is quite extreme. I dun wanna bk in.
The people there, some are strange, some are disgusting, some are ok.
But more than that, its just the training.
Its just. AHHH.
Anyway, i'm keeping a positive attitude to it.
At least i'm trying to do so.......
To think i used to be so happy in school....

Achieve

Listening to : The Man Who Can't Be Moved - The Script

Well, today was quite a good day.
Though there were many complications, all i can say was that it all ended quite well.
In fact, i'm quite satisfied with the outcome.
Well, In training, I'm done with half of hell. Which is honestly good.
I think i'm actually able to pull this controlling thing off. HAHA.
Anyway, did a few things this week.
To actually complete some things i intend to do this year, i actually bothered to start.
I FINALLY applied for driving. YUP!
I'm quite happy i did so. Feels good getting the date. I'll never forget how it feels.
Maybe i will...
Anyway, was thinking and honestly, i've heard from people you gotta ba happy to be successful.
Well, from what i think. Thats RIGHT!
Yeah, i remember feeling the same way in A levels. So those burning the oil...
Be HAPPY STUDYING!!!
Oh and yeah, i gotta ba a happier person in camp. haha.

Well, was talking to mark the other day....
4 places we HAVE to go after ORD.
Its expensive, but what the heck, if not now then when?
1) New York
2) Las vegas
3) Los Angeles
4) Hawaii
Oh and yes, if shiming you're reading this....
You're not excluded.....
So make plans for 2010. HAHA!

to the end

Listening to : I will follow you into the dark



I'm quite a happy man. Heh, maybe its just recently.
Just ran my 10k. Quite fun run going with Calvin and all.
Heh, well, highlight would be the graduation yesterday.
Yup, the SOT graduants are really the stars of the night.
To me, it only one girl! HAHA! Yup! Its my SUPERGIRL!
Don't ask me why man, but she's really the best there is. Heh.
Many won't know the problems she ahd the past 5 months in sot.Yup, gotta admit, it really was exceptionally not easy for her.
Maybe its a biased point of view, but i'm really proud of her for making it this far.
For pushing so much, guess i'll really follow her till the end. Heh.
Many are asking me, when's my turn.....
Ok fine, after i got long hair again. HAHA!
Well, gonna watch money no enough 2 soon.
hope its going to be nice. WELL!! See my girl soon!

Lightning

Listening to : Check yes Juliet - We the Kings


Wow, this week was really quite good.
HAHA! Yes it was, it started quite well, ended better.
Well, other than guard duty, the week was quite ok.
NExt week will be quite short as well, other than assessment 1. Everything else is ok.
Well, the news all around.
The bolt. HAHA!
Yes the USAIN BOLT!
He was AMAZING!
A 100 in 9.69
A 200 in 19.30
A 4x100 in 37.10
Amazing stuff, i'm really amazed by it.
Well, only one pic and one word will summarise all i think.
LOVE

Confidence

Listening to : Bottle it up : Sarah Bareilles

I'm back on a wednesday! I'm happy once again!
I just did my Ex 5 and i think it went relatively well.
Not just that, i just met shiming. I'm really happy cause i met her too!
Well, i guess its these times which really just make u appreciate the time u have in life.
HAHA!
I dunno, i'm quite enjoying this week though its longer for me.
Maybe i'm thinking differently now.
U just need one thing along the week to just tip everything over!
That makes u really high....
I want my weekend to come. Though its short.....
But still, i know this weekend is important for shiming...
I wanna be there. Well!!! Other than that...
Mark's last week, Alvan short week.....
We're all experiencing different things eh. HAHA!

the time period...

Listening to : Hate that i love you - Rihanna

Well, i hate this time of the week the most.
The few moments at home b4 i book in.
I really hate it. I dunno why, just that i wanna get out b4 i get in.
This sucks.
Somhow, the the days when my gf was here in the last few moments made it alot better.
HINT HINT!
ok. book in time. cya in a week...

Superman of speed

Listening to : Disturbia - Rihanna

Well, its the olympic season!
The time where Records get smashed!
Dreams get shattered for some, but dreams come true for many!
Glory to country is brought and best of all, skills that kill are seen
Well, I guess to me, i'll just be looking at 2 sports.
Basketball and athletics!
Well, all eyes on the 'redeem' team of USA for basketball.
Kobe bryant is almost top form, Lebron is on fire, Wade is crazy. Can't wait to see who gets the gold!
For track, i'm really looking at the sprints, quite exciting to see who gets crowned the fastest man on Earth. Its quite a battle between the supermen of speed.
HAHA! Came up with that phrase, not bad eh. My bet is on Tyson Gay for the 100 and Wariner for the 400. For hurdles, heh, Liu Xiang will be my fave for that.
Hope they all get their golds.

On a more patriotic side,
SINGAPORE GOT THEIR 1ST MEDAL!
Good job table tennis ppl.
HAHA! I kinda felt quite proud of my country when i saw them win.
I mean, getting a trophy is really showing the world u own.
Yup, swe owned the rest in PING PONG!
heh, too bad for all the other events i guess. Singapore can never see basketball or track man. Not even close.
One day, i just hope to be one of the superman of speed.
Hmmm, maybe i'm dreaming too much.

ANYWAY!
Controlling in air force is really no joke.
Getting scolded more and more each day.
However, i'm trying to keep a positive attitude towards it.
Like even if i can't make it, i'll just go to the army side and also be happy there.
Heh, guess the key thing is to just be happy.
Remember that was quite the attitude i had when i was having hell in the army wing.
Yeah, it was PURE hell. I hated it quite badly.
So for now, i'm just going to be happy controlling. YUP!!
Love what u're doing and do what you love. I always will keep that ideal to myself.
Alright! gonna rest a little then go church.
After that its supporting AMELIA LEE for BIZZ QUEEN!

Quite ready for ah meng...

Listening to : Viva La Vida - Coldplay

I love this song. I really do, i guess coldplay really went beyond they're usual genre in this song.
Or maybe this is the epitome of their genre.
Sadly, i don't exactly love the rest of the songs in the album.
Well, I still think coldplay rocks. Most of their songs are my faves.
Well, top 2 bands in which i wanna go for their concerts.
MUSE and COLDPLAY!
Yes... Muse is like amazing when they come to concerts.
Their music is different yet stands out.
Too bad i have yet to go for both bands concerts.

On another note! Today is my LAST day of break.
I honestly feel cold when i move back to the simulator.
My R/T will come out strange and i'm quite sure that My controlling will be a little shaken.
I got one unsatisfactory already.
I just hope i don't get another one.
I still don't think i did THAT badly. Or rather, it just depends on who i do with.
I'm gonna be mentally ready for the BASTARD instructor!!!
The past 5 days were great nonetheless. I really do feel refreshed and all

I guess it felt great cause of the people i hung out with. Yeah.
Met mark close to everyday, to hang out,
The trackers / Family were around too, my class.
Tan sijia, the Lee couple.
The Justice League and even celine whom i've strangely started talking to again.
We used to be Quite good friends in the past i think.
My Supergirl went overseas but she kinda felt there all the time beside me.

Yeah, thats why my week felt good.
Now that the break is coming to an end, i'm quite ready for anything they can throw me.
I accepted the fact, if i have to ooc, i will.
But i'll do anything i can to prevent that.
Cause i know i can do all things! :)

Confused yet again

Listening to : Break the ice

I'm bored...
The break is so long i'm actually bored.
Well, i guess i know how mark feels now,
doing close to nothing or irrelevant things the whole day.
Just today, was thinking about how i'm thinking too much at times.
It gets irritating.
That makes me confused, so much so i'm led astray.
Gotta stop it at times.
Thats why i gotta focus on a simple few things now.
AAAAHHHHHHHHHH

Mission Accomplished

Listening to : Crushcrushcrush - Paramore

I am now at the 4th day out of 5 in my so called 'break'.
I have to admit, its really working.
I feel alot more relaxed and really happy i took the break.
Spent a good day with my girlfriend, friday was spent celebrating birthdays and partying a little.
I guess its really a fulilling 5 days.
Whats more!?!? I've got 2 more days!
Today gonna go service, i guess will hang with my cg, or at least try to do so.
Still can't exactly CLICK with them. I still find em a little tough to break.
ANYWAY! Been going to a few new places.
Now i just wanna rest and recover my body.
But bad thing is that i've been drinking WAY too much.
3 days in a row! On friday we spent a LITTLE too much on drinks.
So ya, my stamina is likely to be destroyed.
Gonna go service now. Still relatively tired....

Maxed OUT!

Listening to : Killa

They say a max out point is when your brain is saturated and u can't control anymore.
Think the max out point when we're out of camp is when we have so much fun we can't sleep.
HMMM...THATS HELL FUN!
Ok fine, its a very simple minded thing, the more time spent sleeping, the more time we waste!
Same theory as taking cabs, u buy ur time.
But even still, have been going out the past few days.
To the point its actually draining my sleep away EVERY time!!!
Like the past few days i've been running on like 4 hours of sleep.
Yesterday with only 2.
This is crazy!! But i kinda love it. Yup.

On my birthday one of my good friends tan sijia kinda surprised me!!
In that, i was quite shocked, like really.
I dunno how to explain what she did, maybe u shld just go see her blog yeah!
HAHA, well, all i can say was the my supergirl is also great in organizing the day.
Had a whole lot of fun that day!

Yesterday went out with some of the guys
After that i met one of my long lost friends celine.
Quite funny how we started talking, well, friends like these are quite tough to come by.
Apparently both of us are like experiencing alot of similar things.
OH WELL!!! Its funny.
GONNE GO OUT NOW!!!!!

ambitions ambitions

Listening to : Sunday Morning

WELL!!! Now that i'm relatively sober....
I came to realise 7 aug is today. WOW! I never thought it'll be THIS fast...
HAHA! Can still remember how 4 months ago we would check whens our birthdays and when can we take off to have some fun. GUESS ITS TODAY!!
Not that one year is gone, INCREDIBLY FAST!!! Alot was done i guess.
LEMME SEE....
A LEVELS!
Post A LEVEL FUN
Pre-enlistment Desperate fun
ENLISTMENT
POP
The FIRST experience
Getting into OCS
GETTING INTO AFST
GETTING INTO AFS.

Seems uneventful eh, what to do. Thats an NSF for you. HAHAHHA.
Though I'm quite sure life would be a little more hectic but fun the coming year

Now that thats done, there's now PART 2! What i want to do NEXT YEAR!?!?
COMMISSION
Maintain time spent with ALL friends
Try to build iron man, or be INSPIRED to build iron man.
Learn how to make drinks
Run ALOT MORE!
Go to PLAB and enjoy life there.
KEEP LOVING MY GIRLFRIEND!
Hopefully not to lose my sanity due to NS or whatever reason.
Get Hell drunk just ONCE (not in the club though)
LEARN HOW TO DRIVE!
Pick up reading and exercising my brain.
THIN MY LEGS!
Recontact some secondary school friends and some good old friends from the past. (TRYING TO ALREADY)

Yup, the amount of things i wanna do definitely exceeds those which i did last year.
Hopefully that won't be a problem.
HAHA! But it seems lionel has changed a little in 2008.
I kinda like it this way a little.
Good friends and extreme fun!
THATS IT! Gonna go patour now!

So tight

Listening to : ThAts what you get - Paramore

I just got back. well, yesterday was quite fun having dinner out and all.
I was quite pleasently surprised.
Yeah, my break kinda starts now.
the next 5 days i'm just gonna chill and relax.
get my mind off things.
i know i ain't doing too well in my exercises. But i'm honestly scared everytime i go up.
Guess i just wanted to get my mind off things thats all.
I was so tired and just wanted to chill.
Guess this is the best time.
I'm honestly anticipating tomorrow. Today was good. can't wait for tomorrow.
Love u girl, thanks for everything that is to come!
LIONEL WILL GO BACK TO AFS REVIVED!!!!

So much?

Listening to : Thats what you get - Paramore

I dunno, maybe its just me, but i utterly HATE this time of sundays.
Its late and its nearing the time to go back to camp.
I honestly hate going back to camp sp badly.
I would be glad to endure tough training like hell if i could go home everyday.
But this? Its a little too much to be true.
I detest the tower simulator actually. Its so tough.
Its demoralising, but i know i can do it one way or another.
If u screw up here, everyone knows.
Which is quite dumb. Oh god. I just wish to get over this training phase.
The Dumb instructor is honestly not the nicest guy around.
I'm so waiting for wednesday. When i can truly end this week.
Weekend come QUICK!

Blues!

Listening to : No One - Alicia Keys

Its the AFTERNOON!
Sleep was good, heh. Well, woke up feeling quite ok.
Going out today. can't spend much time with shiming, guess cause she woke up at like 12.
HAHA! Gotta admit she sleeps ALOT!
Anyway, still think yesterday was quite fun dancing with my girlfriend.
Bad thing is that she gotta do many many things today. So i only got tonight with her.
Hope tomorrow there's some leftover time.
I remember last week was a real breather for me.
Like it was really quite fun. Hope this week will be the same way.
Lunch with family then hopefully dinner with some of the trackers.
Hopefully shiming can be with me for some time in the afternoon before she goes to FOP.
Dunno, somehow my birthday is going to be a leave day, but i dunno wat to do.
Doubt i'll go crazy. heh, i just wanna chill and relax that day. WHAO!

These are the nights...

Listeining to : the great escape

Wow, yesterday was truly quite fun i think.
spending it with shiming and all. Guess its a first for me.
But i'm really tired ad considering i just got home, its now like 5 am in the morning.
I'm waiting for alvan to pop by so that i can pass him my number 4.
Hopefully i never need to use it again thats whay i wanna give it to him.
Well, dun wanna comment too much on the previous week cause nothing really much did happen
So in such a case, look forward to next week! National day week and leave week!
That means super slack and alot of days off week!
I can't wait man. I just wanna chill and relax.
Only downside is that possibly she gotta go overseas next weekend.
And also, for some dumb reason, cell is on thursday.
I'm totally not going this time round. Quite irritated actually.

Oh and yes, wouldn't it be great if u were really superman?
I wish i really was.
I really hope i still am at times.
Just feels great when u can do the impossible eh.
I dun wanna be a hancock, but i just wanna make ppl happy.
That'll be really nice eh. Ok. No more emo-ing.

Confusion?

Listening to : hypnotized - Akon

Exhausted is one of the smallest words that can describe how i'm feeling now.
In the physical sense at least.
This weekend was by far the most tiring of all.
Friday and saturday had long nights and then today playing in the sun
It really took alot of energy outta me. In fact now i'm not feeling the best.
Sadly, i still gotta book in.
Once again, i just wish i was a free man. A civillian. Soon i guess.
But on the other hand, sentosa splash was actually really fun.
I thought it kinda brought back the roaring lionel.
I'm just blur now. I dunno, its so strange on one hand but its really who i am on the other.
It was fun partly cause of shiming.
I really love her man. HAHA! I hope she reads this.
Anyway, i gotta spend more time with everybody else too man.
But for now, i'm just gonna try to get as much rest as i can before 2moro exercise.
Confirm will get scolded left right center.

Sound

Listening to : Because of you - Ne-yo

Having a sound system the sizw of your previous com ROCKS!
Oh god, i love music and now its AMAZING!
Guess i spent alot and its WORTH IT!
ANyway, i'm finally out!
this week was rather demoralising. Yes it was!
Heh. Guess its just me but yeah, wish it was alot easier for Aerodrome phase.
Recently been less tolerent over many things. But either way, i'm still happy. Haha! I'm trying to be at least. In the next few days, i'm gonna be going crazy with practical.
I got only this LAST 2 days to truly unwind.
Good news is that wednesday we got our nights out.
OH YEAH!!
So its a real morale booster for me. I mean, its finally come true and all.
But i really am gonna work for it. Going to mug real hard and make sure i don't fail or anything.
I'm up for tower controller on monday.
You know the aircraft which over ran the runway???
I doubt its the pilots fault.
Its the controllers fault. IE. MY FUTURE POSITION.
Scary eh. ANYWAY! I'M OUT! So time to chill and listen to music blasting at my ears!

Run the show??

Listening to : Run the Show - Kat DeLuna

Today is a good day!!! Cause its BOOK OUT DAY!!
Its been so long since i have been able to come out like this on a monday!
Thank God for the break tomorrow.
Honestly, i dunno why we have this other than the fact that its RSAF day or something.
Anyway, recently have been quite into running, or rather very addicted to running.
This is the 1st time in the past 7 months that i have actually been exercising at home willingly.
I dunno why, i guess the runner in me is coming up again??
Maybe its the time of the year, where every wants to race again. I miss those days.
The track team has been doing a splendid job.
I really am proud of them. In fact, going back to school with mark tomorrow.
Hopefully can catch up with the rest and also to gym!!!
Not forgetting to run!
Wanna meet up with my other friends, all of em.
Guess i haven't been too good a buddy to some ppl.
My class ppl, my sec sch friends, my cg, my family.
AHHHH.
too little time in a day i guess. HAha. This calls for more bookout!

Sunday Morning!

Listening to : Sunday Morning - Maroon 5

Its SUNDAY MORNING! Rain ain't falling, haha
But i gotta book in EARLY TODAY! In fact in about 20 min i gotta start getting ready.
Just gotta eat lunch 1st. So still ok. Haha.
I'm really really exhausted and tired man. Too tired to be true.
I hope the next few days will be more fun though.
The past week was a crazy week for most of us.
Especially the last few days building up to the exam.
Heh, good thing this week we'll have alot of free time and all with tuesday off.
I'm really glad. In fact i'm QUITE looking forward to this week.
I'm effectively only booking in for the exam. Thats all. HAHAHA! ok ok, I'm crazy.
Anyway! I guess today will be fun as well. Though i'm really tired now still.
Hopefully my running hasn't deproved after yesterday.
Though it was on hell of a time. HAHAH

Lost Mind

Listening to : Too Bad - Nickelback

Well, in a few hours time i gotta go in to do guard duty.
Was supposed to meet Shiming at like now. But guess she gotta do stuff and all.
I'm SIAN!!!! Oh well, wat to do, its just too bad i gotta do this duty.
I just want the next few weeks to be alot more relaxed and all.
Ok, that won't happen, next week is going to be assessment week and exam week the week after. I dunno how on earth we're gonna be able to accomplish and do well for all.
Our instructors were disappointed with our marks in the integrated phase.
THEY EXPECT 90%!!!
How crazy is that eh, its really scary.
I just hope laters guard duty is super relaxed and no walking around.
Was just thinking the point of all this rubbish i'm doing.
I whack so hard for an 8-5 life but is it really worth it.
Guess i feel quite rubbish in camp most of the time.
Maybe its also cause of the people and all, other than that, i guess its the stress too.
THATS LIFE!!!!

The FIRST relaxed day

Don't ask me why i can blog now. Cause if i tell u, i'll prob go jail or something.
WELL!!! i'm in a better mood today. WHY!?!?!?!? Cause today SLACK!!!
Yesyes, its my first day i have NO exercises, NO scolding and NO low morale.
Went to run feeling good. The only SIAN thing is the Cyberspace duty at night.
Other than that, i think i'm relatively happy with the day.
BUT!!! the next few days will be kinda tough i guess. OH OH OH!!
The only good thing is that there's gonna be a few different activities along the week.
Guess it breaks the boringness of the week.
Kinda wanna hang out with EVERYONE AGAIN!!!!
Guess i WILL be emo 2moro.
4 more days to BOOK OUT!!!

Never back down

Listening to : Stronger - Kanye West

Wow, yesterday was a really long day. Not that i'm complaining or anything.
Was actually quite fun. Caught the movie Never Back Down.
It was an AWESOME show. Wow, i never thought it'll be that nice.
Guess its not just about fighting and all, its really cool to see how he really trained.
Kinda makes u wanna learn fighting.
Ok fine, i'll just stick to running. I gotta admit, running does the same to me.
Now i'm psyched up to run and get STRONGER!!!

Black Week

Listening to : The Way I Are - Timbaland

Well, its another week over. This week is labelled BLACK WEEK!
Well, a few weeks ago, there was this day where everything went wrong, thatwas called black monday. This week, EVERYDAY went wrong, so its BLACK WEEK!
Let me summarise the days in a very short point form.
MONDAY! Start of the week, got told off during the few practices we had, not able to run.
TUESDAY! Got scolded like hell for the IPPT things and admin issues.
WEDNESDAY! Got KILLED during exercise 3 by captain Too. TOO MUCH!
THURSDAY! Died during the ex 4 brief when we realised we had to do a thousand things
FRIDAY! BURIED during ex 4 itself. It was a total failure.
So that sums up the week. I thought it was generally the worst week in Air force yet.
Well, maybe there ahs been worst weeks in the army wings, but guess this is the worst for now.
Good pointer is that a few NSF seniors came up to us and told us that WE CAN DO IT!
How i wish that was really really true. Heh, they made it sound tough but really possible.
They did it, so can we. Thats the idea. Well, at least for now, i'm ready for another tough week.
I'm going to get mentally prepared this weekend, i'm going to really chill.
On a good note, today we brought FLT Vamsee out, it was a good experience. I had fun.
Also, chilled with the guys and sm. Really liked spending good time with them.
Guess everyone goes through some pain. This is ours.
So don't ever say C3 is slack.
Cause i think infantry is really really slack.

exploder

Listening to : take you there - Sean Kingston

Its getting crazier by the moment. I'm starting to really dread booking in.
GUess its getting better cause all my other friends are all going ocs.
Making us all in the same boat.
I have to say that this coming week may be a little boring.
Guess cause i had an awesome weekend.
But at least i had my fair share of fun.
HAHAHHAHA

Control

Listening to : Yellow- Coldplay

I'm back from AFS!! Finally, well this was a short week.
But a tough one indeed, was ic so did alot of rubbish and stuff.
Too bad i'll be ic again in what, 4 weeks? Anyway, on a lighter note, we've finally started controlling. Honestly, it's one of the most fun things we've done since enlistment.
Its like playing a game, just that its more complicated and hell fun.
Its extremely cold inside simulators and i'm starting to talk funny i think.
Like i'll hardly say hold on but stand by now.
Its funny but at the same time way cool. BUt we're now only in our first phase.
The one where we just stare at the com screen, not yet to the realy 3D room.
I can't wait for that. BUt for now, i'll just be saying things like, confirm checks complete!!!
MAMBO 4 MILES ON TRACK ON GLIDEPATH REQUEST LAND!!!
I'm sure that never made sense to u reading it. But ya, its fun.
To me at least. I just wish all my friends from school were here doing it with me.
It'll be the best i could ever ask for.

better

Listening to : Better In time - Leona Lewis

Today was good. A good refreshing WEEKDAY!
1st time in a realy long time since i've been out in a week day.
I really wouldn't mind such a day once in a while
I was able to tsee the juniors and train with them, they're doing well.
I kinda miss track training, training with em beats 100 trainings in NS.
It makes you feel good to know that there're ppl there to look out for you and push you on.
Oh well, their nationals are coming, and i remember how it was when it was my nationals exactly one year ago. HAHA! CJC GO GO GO!!
Met up with alvan and mark to gym. Was quite fun, the past few days were fun cuz of them to a certain extent.
Guess, they all form up a significant portion of my life now.
Definitely the day wouldn't be good without seeing shiming, heh.
SHES GOING BATAM NEXT WEEK!
Its gg to be the most lonely and boring weekend ever.
Guess i gotta book in soon, its boring and its extremely draggy.
Good thing this week is much shorter.
But i'm IC this week, sian. AHHH

Breathe

Listening to : Big girls don't cry - Fergie

So I finally got back home after a long morning.
The funeral was well, a first for me, i was shocked, sad, trying to focus and then i realised how much i should treasure life.
Oh well, i dunno why the sudden emo-ness. The fact i started the blog again means i'm emo.
But i'm ok with it i guess. can't really be bothered what others are thinking of me.
Well, today is back to life!! BYE 2LT CLIFTON LAM!!! He was a good man. I really have to admit that, but i'm sure he's in a better place. I'm glad he lived and was part of my life though it was in a small way.
On a lighter note, i have off in due!!! MONDAY IS MINE!!
Gonna enjoy my sunday nights and monday morning. Going to go training for the 1st time in a long time. I'm gonna like that. I really will do i guess.
In a whiles time the best person is coming over, makes things all the more better.
Haha, its fathers day today, guess my dad is enjoyinh himself.
I'm a happier man today! FOOOOOOO

Revival!!!

Listening to " Time of My Life - David Cook

Its been SO SO SO long since i last blogged. longest break i have taken so far. What 6 months!?!?
Guess its time to actually change trhe blogskin as well. Hopefully its a good change.
Why am i suddenly back?? I don't know much myself. Guess maybe its a little too stressful in NS??
I'm now in C3 in Air Force School. Life has been good and all. Just alot of studying and pracitcal.
I have no more physical training!! WOULD YOU BELIEVE THAT!??!?
Well, the saddening thing most recently would be the passing away of OCT Clifton.
He was my friend in Air Wing back in Safti MI. I only got to know him better in the last 2 weeks or so. Its really a waste to me. I just wish I could have done more.
It makes me look back and think how fragile life can be and all.
Just wish we all had a little more time to say that one more thing before we go.
Well, bottom line, we're all getting old. BTW! The media is partially wrong about details of his death. I am a little annoyed by this but well, its singapore.
I can get jailed if i say anymore.
2moro is the funeral itself. Its my very 1st funeral in my life.
Its my 1st and i'm participating in it. I'm going to do it to the best that i can.
Things haven't been too easy with life other than NS as well.
I duno, disconnection is starting to happen in various areas of my life.
Especially with one group of friends i thought i'll never be away from.
I'm getting closer to some other buddies too, which i'm really glad to have as well.
As for Supergirl, Shiming is still the best i've ever had. I would never have made it this far without her.
I guess going to NS had really changed a part of me, either for the better or the worst. I honestly don't really know. I'll only know in due time.
So in the meantime, i'm gonna make full use of tonight to just relax and not think about anything at all. Thats becoming one of my favourite hobbies...