Victorious

Listening to : Yesterday - Leona Lewis

Well, I guess its time for us to actually evaluate how has the year been going.
In the more mental/spiritual/emotional side rather than physical side
I guess segmenting it into quarter sections won't be the best idea.
So lets do it by stages.
BMT was good i guess, I was quite Positive most of the time. Despite the initial culture shock for me into ns, it was an ok transition. I clung on to Shiming for most of my support. Not only that but also to God. however, i didn't really bother to meet many friends too often. I dunno why too.

Next was HELLO OCS. Now this was REALLY hell. Like i've never experienced such tough training in a LONG time. Like it really Pushed my mental and physical limits. However, at this point, i was the MOST optimistic and strongest. I duno why too. My girlfriend was there to always support me too.

Thereafter was AIR WING! It was actually a good time for me. Like up till now. Its AFST FTW! I really enjoyed my time there. I had the best buddy there as well. It was also when i started to make time for my outside friends and shiming was really great too! Heh, not only that, I was serving in usher and also quite happy about life on a whole!

Then there was a DIP when i entered the C3. Honestly, life was less demanding like it wasn't so taxing on you physically but it really pushed me. Like this was the part of my life when i was really the lowest. I somehow just lost all the positive attitude i had and also felt quite a drop in my spiritual life. Heh, I honestly felt quite lost. Not only that, there was pressure from the leaders, instructors, friends. I was up to my neck! Shiming was there all the time, thank god for that. Even that, there were times when i felt i wasn't the nicest boyfriend. Also, i think i tried too hard to accomodate ALL my friends, guess I should've done things in a more relaxed way.

For now, some things are still persisting, some things are getting better. However, it really is a disappointment for me. oh man. Like i remember how it was in school previously! I was on top of the day, i always ended the day victorious and started it with an attitude to conquer! However, Now its like I'm trying to survive. Notice the change in use of words. I'm barely excelling in anything i do now. I'm not the 'conqueror' I once was. Thus the name of this blog. I hope i've found the root of the problem. I think i did today in service. I know i'm supposed to wake up feeling good and end it feeling i've been voctorious! Thats how it was all the time! I was on top of every situation! I want it to be that way again.

This post seems quite emo? Yeah, guess it does. Its not the NORMAL lionel post eh. Anyway! Life goes on! Happy to see all the trackers! :)